What’s Blocking Your Healing, and How Can You Set It Free?
How Transforming Your Relationships Can Heal Your Life
Have you ever wondered why, no matter how hard you try, some struggles seem to stick around? Maybe it’s food cravings that pull you in, emotional eating that feels impossible to control, or even just a sense of frustration with your health. The answer might not lie in what you’re doing but in how you’re relating—to yourself, your body, and even your life as a whole.
At the core of what I call The Healing Mindset is a simple but powerful truth: everything in your life is a relationship. When those relationships are unbalanced or even unkind, it’s no wonder life feels harder than it should. But when we shift those relationships into ones rooted in love, acceptance, and intention, healing becomes not only possible but inevitable.
Let’s unpack this together—how we can transform these relationships and, in turn, transform ourselves.
It’s All About Relationships
Here’s something we don’t often think about: everything we do, feel, and experience is part of a relationship. It’s not just about the obvious ones—like your spouse, friends, or coworkers. You’re also in relationship with your body, your food, your habits, and even your thoughts.
Think about it: when you’re stressed, how do you treat your body? Do you speak kindly to yourself, or do you dive headfirst into a pint of ice cream? That’s a relationship right there—one that might need a little TLC.
The beautiful thing is that when you begin to nurture these relationships—especially the one with yourself—you start to notice changes in every area of your life.
The Power of Giving and Receiving
Healthy relationships, whether with others or yourself, are built on two key principles: giving and receiving. These aren’t just actions—they’re states of being.
When you’re in a state of giving, you show up as your best self. You’re kind, open, and present—not just for others, but for yourself. And receiving? That’s all about acceptance—meeting life as it comes without trying to fight or control it.
Let’s make this practical.
Giving: Imagine having a craving for junk food. Instead of beating yourself up, what if you gave yourself compassion? Ask, “What do I really need right now?” Giving yourself understanding might just lead you to a healthier choice—not because you’re forcing it, but because you’re honoring yourself.
Receiving: Life doesn’t always go our way. Maybe your day gets derailed by stress or setbacks. Instead of resisting, you can pause, breathe, and ask, “What lesson is this offering me?” That’s receiving—accepting life as it is and allowing it to guide you forward.
These principles might sound simple, but they’re the foundation of healing. And here’s where things get interesting: the opposite of giving and receiving is what keeps us stuck.
The Ego’s Game: Taking and Withholding
When life feels hard, it’s often because we’re caught in patterns of taking and withholding.
Taking: This might look like using food to numb your feelings, chasing approval from others, or trying to control situations to feel secure. It’s the ego’s way of saying, “I need this to feel okay.”
Withholding: On the flip side, withholding happens when we deny ourselves love or kindness. It’s when we refuse to forgive ourselves for past mistakes or hold back our true selves because we’re afraid of judgment.
These patterns disconnect us from our true nature. They make life feel heavy, like we’re constantly swimming upstream. But the moment we recognize them, we can choose a different path—a path rooted in love.
Healing Begins With You
If your relationships with life feel unbalanced, the place to start is within. Your external world is always a reflection of your internal state. If you’re feeling stuck, ask yourself:
“How am I treating myself?”
“What am I withholding from myself?”
For example, if you’re chasing love or approval from others, it might be time to ask if you’re giving those things to yourself. Are you kind to yourself when you make a mistake? Do you allow yourself moments of joy, or are you constantly waiting for “someday”?
Healing begins when you start treating yourself the way you’d treat someone you love deeply.
Lessons in Disguise
Here’s a perspective shift that can change everything: every challenge you face is a lesson in disguise.
When you feel frustrated or overwhelmed, it’s easy to want to push those feelings away. But what if they’re there to show you something important? Maybe that craving is pointing to an unmet need. Maybe that difficult conversation is teaching you patience or courage.
Every experience is a chance to grow. The more you meet life with curiosity instead of resistance, the more those lessons reveal themselves.
Gratitude: The Ultimate Reset
If there’s one thing that can transform your mindset instantly, it’s gratitude. Gratitude shifts you into receiving mode—it aligns you with abundance, love, and possibility.
Even in tough moments, a simple “Thank you for this experience” can open the door to healing. You don’t have to understand the “why” right away. Just trust that life is working for you, not against you.
Aligning Essence and Substance
This is the secret sauce of transformation: your inner state (essence) creates your outer reality (substance).
If you feel lack, frustration, or unworthiness inside, your life will reflect it. But when you cultivate love, abundance, and gratitude within, those qualities naturally flow into your external world.
It’s not about forcing change. It’s about becoming the kind of person who attracts what they desire simply by being in alignment with it.
The Path Forward
So, how do we bring this all together? Start by asking yourself these questions:
What relationships in my life feel unbalanced?
How can I give more love, kindness, or understanding—to myself and others?
What lessons might my current challenges be offering me?
Healing isn’t about perfection—it’s about connection. When you shift your relationships from taking and withholding to giving and receiving, you create space for health, happiness, and peace to flow naturally.
It all starts with you. Every thought, every choice, every moment is a chance to cultivate The Healing Mindset. The more you embrace it, the more you’ll find that the life you’ve been chasing has been within your reach all along.